Do guys find me intimidating
“I’ll run up and down [at my local gym] and not a lot of women would do that,” she told Women’s Health.
“And least of all me because I don’t want to draw attention to myself at the best of times.
It typically involves a great deal of drunken analysis, the focus of which is to compile a list of non-threatening answers to the question—“Why didn’t he want me?
”—and I’ve had a lot of success with this approach for the past couple of years.
As she went over their conversation in her mind, she realized there was one thing that stood out—though she did not want to believe it.Everything went smoothly—until they met in person for a cup of coffee.They had many things in common and talked for about 45 minutes.Some avoid the place altogether because they feel embarrassed by men seeing them in tight lycra.“I go to the gym because I don’t have a good figure,” one tells me. But I don’t want people to judge the way I look when I don’t even like how my body looks yet. Because most men don’t shout at women in the gym – they sexually objectify them instead.
“I really, really want to date you, but I’m too intimidated.” He’s a shitheel, and I’m better off without him, but this one sentence keep echoing because it matches the story that not only have I been telling myself for years, but that my family, and friends, and the culture at large tells us: intelligent, capable women who talk about how they feel and what they want scare the crap out of men. It doesn’t help when my brothers, my father, married women I know, single women, all just sort of shrug and go, “It’s distasteful, but true.” Which feels shitty!